In our weekly blog posts we've been asked to reflect and share specific experiences that come up in our field work as well as comment on the articles we've been assigned to read for the week.
I wanted to share some of the fulfufilling experiences I've had working with the single refugee mothers at Catholic Community Services. I'm a Job Developement Intern and I've been assigned 6 women to tutor in ESL or Job Skills depending on their English competency. It's been Symbolic Interactionism at it's best.
I've learned so much from these strong wonderful women. I've learned as a mother myself how we view and interpret our reality has many similarities and differences. We all value our children and we know that their education is important to their success in this country. The power we feel as parents is vastly different. I have no qualms about marching into my sons school to ask questions about scheduling, curriculum, or volunteering opportunities. These women, however, are intimidated and unsure of themselves and the role they play in their childrens education. Something as simple as their child's birthdate being incorrectly listed on their identification has caused some real problems that have kept one of their children out of school for months.
As we've gotten to know each other and worked with the language barrier we are beginning to understand the meanings behind each other's actions. I don't take it personally when they've made a Dr.'s appointment on the one day I can visit their home. They've come to understand that I just can't come the next day to tutor them. I have school, work, and a family of my own to care for.
I've come to appreciate the symbols in their lives that hold special meaning to them. Most of the women I tutor cover their heads and are never comfortable with company seeing them unless they are properly covered. I make sure to dress conservatively, although I cannot bring myself to wear a dress.
We do a lot of laughing and smiling when things get confusing and even though we come from very different places of the world that laughter breaks through all the barriers. I've shared pictures of my son and I've met some of their children. I interpret their actions with their children as a fierce pride and love for them. They want their children to learn with them and I've instructed them to practice their new English skills with their children throughout the week. Their overall skill improvment has been promising.
As I've come to learn more about their complicated relationships with children, friends, and their support systems I've learned why they've adopted certain attitudes and expectations with the United States. I've learned that at first they believed that all people from the US have an abundance and can give to others continuously. As they've learned about my tight budget, financial responsibilities, and the expenses of school for me and my son they are learning that not everyone has it easy here in the U.S.
I've really enjoyed being one of their many links to life here in the U.S. We've learned a lot about each other and have begun to develop trust and respect that comes from honesty, tolerance, and a willingness to learn. It's been a two way street, for sure. I value all that I've learned about how these strong women view the world, interpret their reality, and adjust their perceptions and attitudes as they learn more about living in the U.S. I too have learned how to better understand the meanings behind their actions and my own, become more aware of the world view concerning refugees, and learned to respect the symbolism in their daily lives.
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